You are Not Alone
by Afrieal
Summary: After Tousen leaves Komamura feels alone his 12th seat decides to show him he's not alone but complications arise in further chapters this is a Komamura/OC romance fic rated M just in case. ch 1 is related to Nikki's name anyone who gueses it gets a treat
1. cinnamon

Okay I blame this one on the fact I've got a fever and a bronchial infection coming on, Nyquil and wondering if there are other partial Yokai (demon) shinigami. I know of one authoress the wonderful Gwen Waverider in her story said something about Gin and I don't know if others have as well but here's my go at it.

Af

We don't own bleach or Inu Yasha (it's not really mentioned but we've borrowed from it as well) they are owned by their creators we just play with the characters and then put them back in their little universes with gratitude. Nikki is ours though if you want to borrow her just ask.

_**FYI Af is mixing terminology from the English and Japanese versions of bleach please if she misspells something let us know so we can fix it all flames will be used to heat the teapot as well as the humidifier we've got going for her chest. Also we found a Japanese/English site and have been trying to be more accurate for names grin **_

_**Rysh **_

Komamura walked from the 7th squad training grounds to his office deep in thought wondering yet again why his friend Tousen had made his decision and why he hadn't seen the problems he was having. So lost in thought he almost ran into his 12th seat as she was stepping out of his office.

"What were you doing in my office Nikki?" he asked.

"Making sure you had hot tea Komamura Taiocho," she said smiling. "You are still recovering from your fight with Kenpachi Taiocho and this blend is good at helping rebuild body and spirit." She bowed and turned to go.

"Thank you Nikki." He looked at the teapot and cup blinking with surprise to see a tall cup with a straw sticking out of it and the scent of the tea was a pleasant mix of cinnamon, cardamom, clove and other scents he couldn't name but were familiar to him. "Nikki what?" he turned to the door but she had already left.

"Hmm strange child." He said to himself pouring a cup of the tea and trying the straw, she had left found it easier than trying to use a cup with his muzzle. Shaking his head again, he let the warmth of the tea soothe him as he sat down to wait for Iba to finish with the latest batch of recruits. Picking up one of the latest of the never-ending batches of reports, he started wading his way thru the paperwork pouring himself more tea from the pot.

Nikki walked to the training dojo with the first aid supplies she had just gotten from 4th squad shaking her head and smiling. The latest batch of recruits were better than most but she knew they would have to train hard to prepare for the war to come. Just as she rounded the corner and was about to enter she heard a shriek of pain coming from the room. She ran into the room smelling the blood in the air.

"HOLD" she yelled (1)then running to the fallen shinigami, she grabbed the supplies she needed and began treating the wound. "Sir" she said to Iba "I don't think it's to serious I'm sorry for disrupting practice." She treated the injury and helped the young man to his feet. "I'll take him to the 4th and come back." She bowed to him grabbed the unused supplies placed them in the cabinet then left with the injured man.

"Alright" he said, to the youngster that was the injured man's opponent. "What happened?"

"I didn't pay as much attention to my opponent as I should have sir and now he's injured," he said nervously.

"And?" Iba said.

"Now he's injured and I'm in trouble?" he said shaking.

"Yes report to the 4th you're on cleaning duty for a week," Iba said with a sigh. "and you're also going to be doing double sword drills in your spare time so this doesn't happen again. DisMissed" he said to the rest of the recruits. He walked to the office wondering how Nikki had gotten to the recruit so fast. He was sure she hadn't used shunpo, and how had she known he was bleeding to call hold before he had the only other person he'd seen with that kind of ability was the Taiocho.

I'm leaving it there for now… If it's good enough I'll try to continue it now the bed beckons as it's 3 in the morning… please review even if you hate it.

(1) This term is something the Marshals in the Society for Creative Anachronism(a) yell during sword fights if it's called you FREEZE I've seen heavy fighters freeze with one foot in the air preparing a deathblow swing because a little has wandered into the Eric

(fight zone)

(a) SCA is a medieval recreation group that literally is worldwide visit www. SCA . Org (take out the spaces)for details if you're interested most of our knowledge of sword work comes from it and other friends that actually use said items.

Music inspiration- (what was playing as I was writing these are a few of the songs)

Leave out all the rest and Nobody's Listening Linkin park

Sadame from X-TV

I stand Alone by GodSmack


	2. Chapter 2

To our readers:

Due to MASSIVE screw ups beyond our control the fic update will be delayed We're sorry. To make a long story short we finally got the disks transfered to two flash drives our brother kindly offered to print them for us. MISTAKE!! His machine has a problem with the usb ports and fried BOTH flash drives which had our only copies of the updates on them (computer copies our notes are still hand written) the disks got left in another city at Af's 'ka-san's house (we hope) Now it's coming up on the anniversary of a favourite relitive's death and Af's having to travel to be with the rest of the family to keep her 'ka-san from falling to pieces (again) so that's going to delay things a bit more. Her 'ka-san has a computer but only has dial up so it's possible we may be able to update at least one story while she's there maybe more depending on how much free time she has (why male relitives can NEVER help properly is beyond us) again we're sorry.

Ryshandra and Afrieal BTW here is a great resourse somone gave us that might help out the Anime Ficcers (take the spaces out) http : / linear. mv. com/ cgi-bin /j-e/ dict 


	3. why

I have to stop using the usual Honorifics at the end of names (Chan, San, Kun ect) for some reason the auto-correct on my copy of word either changes the spelling on the word or deletes it so please don't flame me I'll try to fix it and then re-upload th

I have to stop using the usual Honorifics at the end of names (Chan, San, Kun ect) for some reason the auto-correct on my copy of word either changes the spelling on the word or deletes it so please don't flame me I'll try to fix it and then re-upload the chapter but I'm not holding my breath as Micro-t isn't answering tech support and forget about the help files or booklet. Sorry to screw it up all

Af

We don't own it but if we did we'd go to every blasted Anime Con we could to have fun with it.

_**Af's not happy with this chapter she feels it's lacking something. Constructive ideas will cheerfully be taken into consideration flames will be used to heat the plot bunny nursery (stole that from someone don't remember who) and to heat our tea this week it's red clover for af (actually it's a tonic) and hibiscus for me **_

I forgot to explain the timing a little better this takes place a couple days after Rukia's rescue and stuff about two or so days after Ichi and co. left for the real world Odd Bird is set before the whole shebang. Does that help? If anyone's confused let us know so I can do more authors notes to explain.

_**A HUGE thanks goes to Yama-jii for helping us with some of this he understands the idiot program better than we do so he can get it to work better with tenses and stuff… hell it's his computer so he should understand it (grin) we're just sorry he doesn't put his stuff on this site. But since the only thing he's writing is his collage work it's probably for the best you need a gallon of water just to read that dry stuff this one idiot prof wants him to write hmmm think I'll lampoon her in a later chapter! **_

_Oh Nikki means Cinnamon according to our Japanese site that was the little mystery smile _

Nikki was leaving the fourth squad building after dropping off her injured squad member. She was passing a door that had a sign saying '_No Visitors'_ in big red letters when she heard someone call to her from behind.

"Sempai wait" it said. She turned and found her friend Ami from the 11th squad (1) hurrying towards her with Hanataro scampering to keep up with her.

"Hi Ami, you're back from Patrol? What's…" she started to say when all the sudden it felt like she was being hit from behind with the most painful combination of hatred hopelessness and longing and Nikki felt herself collapse.

"Sempai" Ami said grabbing her. "Hana help me!" They pulled her arms around their shoulders supporting her from either side getting her down the hallway.

"What's wrong Ami, why did she collapse like that?" Hanataro asked as they steered her to a bench in the waiting room.

"Who was in that room we stopped by?" Ami asked as she propped the semi-conscious woman up so Hanna could examine her.

"Hinamori, Momo. She woke up this morning I think." He replied feeling for the pulse in Nikki's wrist.

"Oh gods that explains it. Sempai is a little empathic and if her shields were lowered she would have been blasted." Ami explained quietly. "Do NOT let Korusuchi know he found out I had some latent abilities and you know what he did to me to try to get me."

She said quietly (2) he nodded. Nikki began stirring and the look on her face was not pretty.

"Ummm Ami, I think we need to get her out of here." He said urgently.

"Oh Kami, you're right she's gonna lose it." Ami agreed as she stood up in front of Nikki. "Put her on my back quickly." Hanna lifted her to Ami's back putting her arms over her shoulders and lifting her till Ami hooked her legs at the knee. Ami then hitched her up and walked carefully out of the 4th squad building ignoring the curious looks till they got into the courtyard. She shun-poed towards the woods knowing her friend would need to vent in relative privacy. Hanataro followed her, surprisingly enough, keeping up with her as she flashed across rooftops and leaped over courtyards. Finally, they got her to the woods and Ami let Nikki slide down off her back.

"WHAT IN THE HELL DID THAT BASTARD DO TO THAT CHILD!!" she screamed trying to let all the hurt and pain out as her reaitsu flared out of control. She looked at Ami, took a deep breath and pulled off the necklace she was wearing; a silver star in a circle around the edge the 12 phases of the moon going from moon dark thru the waxing of a full at the bottom of the circle and waning around to the top. Nikki handed it to the younger girl. "Hold this for me Ami. I don't want to break this." She then walked a short distance away then turned again to the two of them saying, "Stay here I won't go far."

Hanataro and Ami looked at each other for a minute then at the woods as a horrible screech rang out. It brought to mind the sound a hollow makes as it is created and both of them looked at the woods then each other. Then there was an explosion.

"KITSUNE-BE" (3) the cry rang thru the woods and more explosions rang out.

"Hana, that's something else I need you to keep quiet. Nobody knows, except for Unahona-Taiocho, and I believe Yammamoto-Sou-Taiocho about her being part yokai." Ami said, "I only found out because I recognized the charm on the necklace she wears," holding up the pendant. "It seals her yokai blood so she doesn't lose control and take a bite out of anything. I'm tempted to try to get one for my Taiocho." She said with grim humor.

"Is that where her empathy comes from?" he asked looking at the pendant.

"I don't think so but that might be part of it." She replied wincing at a particularly loud screech coming from the woods. Then all turned quiet and Nikki walked out of the woods covered in splinters her hair straggling down from the careful braids she usually wore her grey green eyes still shooting off sparks. She reached out for her necklace and Ami placed the silk strand it was on across her palm then wrapped the necklace around it until it was wound around her hand. The pendant was tucked into her palm and pressed into her skin as she tried to send soothing thoughts to her friend.

"If I ever come across that bastard, I think I'll fry him slowly… an inch at a time starting with his fingers and toes, avoiding anything vital until the last." Nikki said, her voice cold and lifeless. "I've been around rape victims before as well as torture victims. That bastard raped her repeatedly bodily and in spirit and using his zampakto he made her think, she wanted it. He made her dependent on him for everything. Both sets of memories are fighting each other inside her mind." She turned to Hanataro. "Tell Unahona Taiocho, she needs to know this to try to figure out how to help her."

"I will Nikki. Thank you."

"Ami, is Kenpachi Taiocho expecting you any time soon? Are either of you going to get in trouble for being here?" she asked.

"They're not expected anywhere, little one," Unahona said appearing as if by magic. "I sensed your disquiet in the squad building. These two did a good job getting you away and to an area you could vent in safety." She turned to the two 7th seats and smiled. "You two should get back to your duties. Zakari Taiocho will be looking for you to report on your patrol now that the dust has settled, Ami. Hanataro, you should let Isane know what Nikki has said. She'll put it on Hinamori's chart and we will hopefully be able to treat her." Unahona turned back to Nikki, placing her hand on the young woman's shoulder as the two bowed and turned to go.

"Sempai, find me if you need me." Ami said before she left.

"That goes for me as well," Hanataro chimed in as they both hurried back to their squads.

"Come here child," Unahona said pulling Nikki into an embrace. Nikki began weeping, deep tearing sobs shaking her shoulders as she collapsed against the motherly captain.

"Why?" was all she could whimper into the older woman's shoulder as she wept.

"If I could answer that little one I'd be able to help more people." Unahona said gently as she brushed the splinters off Nikki's shoulders and smoothed her hair wondering again how all this could have happened.

What do you think so far? Click on the box and leave me your opinion. I'm sorry it keeps taking so long to get these out but real life really sucks lately.

(1) Ami is from my story Odd Bird. I thought I'd borrow her for this story grin

(2)Korusuchi came and tried to take Ami by force a few months after she joined 11th the full story is in the third chapter of OB

(3) This is the cry, Shippo from Inu Yasha uses (in Japanese I've heard it in the movies) when he's casting his Fox Fire. Hey, she is part Kitsune(fox) Yokai hence the title of the fic grin

As with my other story I'm gonna give you some of the music I listened to

Lithium

Going Under

Lacrymosa

Lies by evanescence

Rewrite

After Dark by Asian Kung Fu Generaton

I stand Alone

Voodoo by Gobsmack for added angst during the screeching


	4. Found Out

I am sorry the last chapter was a bit jumpy I think I was reacting to the subject matter a little strongly

I am sorry the last chapter was a bit jumpy I think I was reacting to the subject matter a little strongly. What I did to Momo hit close to the bone on several levels and that's all I'm going to say on that. Nikki's reaction will be a little clearer, I hope, in this chapter. All I can say is never write sensitive subject matter when you're up for days and ill and for goddess sake always let it rest for a day if you do.

Here's a shout out to Kitetheblade. Who was nice enough not to flame me but did let me know I was a bit off with the last chappy. Thanks Rysh has been busy trying to type up my notes for a FMA fic, as well as recovering lost files and sorting thru several notebooks, so I'm solo on this one. There is a bit of jumping from here to there please bear with me.

We don't own it but we now get Shonen Jump Magazine (doing happy anime geek dance) we like to play with the characters tho so don't sue us we're so poor we can barely pay attention. The bleach characters belong to the various organizations that produce that manga and anime Nikki and Aki are Mine, (but if you ask, you can use them).

Oh one last little thing I still am having trouble with honorifics and other stuff so it's a bit of a mishmash of language. PM me with corrections please. We have a new use for flames BBQ-ING annoying plot bunnies. Do they really taste like chicken?

X)X)X)X)X)X)X))X)X)X))X)X))X)X)X)X))X)X)X)X))X))X)X))X)X)X)X)))X))X)X))

Komamura looked up from his desk sensing something different. The hackles on his neck rose as he sensed it again. It was another Kitsune Yokai (1) somewhere close and it was in pain. A knock on his office door brought him back to reality.

"Yes" he said. The door opened and Iba stuck his head in.

"Sir if it's alright I'm taking off now its 1800 hours (2)." He said.

"Fine Tetsuzaemo. Have a pleasant evening," Komamura said still a little distracted by the strange power he sensed. Iba left and he stood, he was going to find the yokai he sensed and see what was wrong.

Meanwhile at the woods near the sokyoku hill with Unahona and Nikki.

"Why what little one?" Unahona asked. She knew there was more to this breakdown than just what happened to Hinimori. (3)

"Why dddid he have to hurt Taiocho… Why did Tttousen have to leave and hurt him?" She stuttered as she wept her amulet dropping to the ground out of her hand unnoticed.

"Nikki" Unahona said gently stroking her hair. "I cannot say why this happened little one, but you must be there for your Taiocho. He needs the support of his squad especially his officers now more than ever." Neither of them noticed the approach of Komamura.

"I'm torn between two worlds…two different sets of instincts…. The human half of me wants to sit and weep….The Kitsune part of me wants to rip them to shreds. I don't feel this way about Kenpachi Taiocho after he fought Taiocho just those three traitors." She stiffened a second something drifting just below the surface of her memories.

"I think little one, that Hinimori's emotions hit you in a moment of weakness and set your youkai instincts off completely. Hanataro and Ami did well to get you out here." Unahona said as she pulled a handkerchief out and wiped Nikki's face. "Have you decided weather or not you are going to tell your Taiocho about your origins?"

"Now I don't know what to do.," she said sitting up. "I'm afraid now with what happened with Tousen and the others…" she stopped and stood the amulet forgotten she looked up towards the hidden Komamura. "Ttttaiochou" she whispered then stood up and shun-poed away like a hunted animal.

"Sajin wait" Unahona said before he could follow. "Don't be to hard on her. She didn't realize you would understand until now. "

He looked at her nodding and chasing after the young woman, hoping against hope he could catch her before her instincts lead her into trouble.

X)X)X)X)X)X)X))X)X)X))X)X))X)X)X)X))X)X)X)X))X))X)X))X)X)X)X)))X))X)X))

This took longer than I had intended. I actually finished most of this about a month ago but plot bunnies kept butting into my editing time… not to mention the whole computer puking and eating most of my work. (This is after Rysh lost a couple chapters of my work)

(When in doubt multiple backups including mailing your work to yourself via hotmail or g-mail that's how I found half the chapter's notes)

BIG HUGE thanks to those who are sticking with me thru this. I'm hoping to get more writing done right now everything is a mass of notes that Rysh and I are trying to sort thru. Another thanks goes to Yamma-Jii for helping me re-edit this (again) even tho it was two in the morning and he had school in several hours. (mates are great for that arnt' they)

Oh and to those that read my Pride fic "It's enough" and commented on the punctuation. I know it sucks but I had pain killers and a couple Somas' (no not soma fixers these are muscle relaxants) I'm just glad it made sense.

(1) Fox demon (I know there's confusion weather he's Fox or Wolf but I'm sticking with fox)

(2) I'm using military time. I don't know what else to use.

(3) Poor Momo can't even catch a break with MSword it keeps trying to change her name

to hemorrhoid or humidor

Music inspiring this chapter

**Vic Mignogna**

Nothing I won't give

**Within Temptation **

Angels

What have you done now?

**X-Japan **

Forever Love (great angsting music)


	5. Chapter 5

_

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_

We don't own Bleach and Inu Yasha or any of the characters we borrow for our fan-fictions. (Nikki and Ami are ours tho if you wish to borrow them just ask) We only borrow them respectfully because we love them so much we are receiving nothing other than the satisfaction of sharing our stories, the hope of reviews and the stress relief of dumping the plot bunnies out of our poor tired brains. Please don't sue it is said that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery so websites like these are by definition flattering to the actual owners. Bleach is owned by Tite, Kubo and Rumiko owns Inu Yasha (i can't remember her full name sorry)

Okay here's the deal. Life SUCKS! Due to several computer glitches I've completely lost the almost finished chapter for this story. I had the notes write it again right? Should have been simple... enter real life between plot bunnies and getting dragged kicking and screaming (alright not kicking and screaming) to family events a few months passed and unfortunately the dreaded writers block hit. This I blame on the current political crisis hell I've got notes for a bunch of stories and chapters that were created during more stressful times than this but there's something about seeing what I thought was an Honorable Man (although I don't agree with his politics) slinging mud at another Honorable man. (I'm not going to go into political stuff don't worry) It's cut my creativity way down. I can't even knit (and if I'm so bummed I can't do things like knit and sew It's bad) I do have a slight favor to ask you dear readers. If you can spare it send a little good energy into the universe to dispel the negativity that's going on right now.

Rysh then came up with her wonderful Yumi Birthday story and had one almost done to go for Kiyone and Sentarou (who share a birthday) as well when someone from another site we post at slammed her disclaimer. Well, Rysh is like me she's kind of insecure about her writing talent. It wouldn't have been so bad if we'd gotten an e-mail or something but to do it as a flame in the review page, just well, freaked her out. (She's finished the story and will post it after this chapter is posted (actually I had another problem and had to put off posting this chapter sorry) I'm having someone double check the disclaimer it's handy having a big family sometimes. I'd like to thank Orionshadow for the nice review left after, on the same fic site, on her behalf tho. (Neither of us are angry at the person or the site we can see the reason just question the method)

Anyway here's the new chapter.

* * *

Sajin extended his senses cautiously trying to find the young hanyou with his youkai alone. He had mixed feelings now that he knew her secret. He didn't blame her for keeping it silent he knew the prejudice both humans and youkai had probably shown her. He had felt it keenly enough to hide his face for centuries here in the soul society. He was a bit saddened that she hadn't known she could come to him afterwards tho.

"Komamura Taicho?" a voice from behind him said. He turned to see one of Nikki's friends Ami Sazuko from 11th squad. "You're looking for Nikki?"

"Yes" he replied. She smiled much to his surprise. Then pulled a pack off her back and handed it to him.

"Good, she doesn't have her amulet on and it would kill her if she went full youkai and hurt someone." Ami said. "Have you ever encountered a hanyou in survival mode before Taiocho?"

"No. What do you mean survival mode?" Komamura replied. "How do you know this?"

"What I'm about to share with you Taiocho is not to be shared with anyone. There are a few who know but you will understand more when I tell you this." Ami replied as they started walking further into the woods. "There are some things I can't tell you (1) but suffice it to say unlike most shinigami I remember my past, I was apprenticed to a priestess after my parents were killed. I also spent a lot of time helping the youkai population that's in hiding in Japan. It's a family calling I guess" she said smiling sadly. "When I got here and was sent to the academy right away I wasn't to surprised because I'd had contact with Shinigami most of my life. When I met Nikki and saw her amulet I knew right away she was hanyou, just not what kind. I made friends with her and carefully let her know I knew and would help her if she needed it." She stopped and looked at him.

"Go On" The Youkai Taiocho said gently.

"Sir, when a hanyou like Nikki goes into survival mode they're feral their instincts are in control. I had a teacher and guardian that was an Inu-hanyou who told me what happened when he used to lose control. Not much terrified him but the thought of losing control did. He was the one that helped develop the talismans and I think he had a hand in making Nikki's." Ami smiled a little then looked at Komamura seriously "Sir what happened to Hinimori Fukutaiocho struck a serious cord in her. Please help her, if anyone can understand her pain I know it's you. There's a cave in the woods we found when we both went to the academy she's probably holed up there. There are some supplies in the pack and a spare uniform for her and of course her amulet. " She bowed to the youkai Taiocho and turned to go.

"Sazuko… Thank you." He said.

"Nikki's my friend Taiocho and we in the 11th don't abandon our friends no matter what." Ami said before she shunpo-ed away.

_**With Nikki **_

"Oh Gods oh lord" she whimpered as she ran deeper into the woods the branches catching on her uniform shredding it. She stopped thinking her youkai instincts coming to the fore as her terror rose. The memory of her death re-surfacing the crowd of people calling her a freak because of her eyes, she didn't remember much else just the pain of death and the unholy glee of the one she had trusted with her secret as he saw her take her last breath. Her terror fueled her flight her inner youkai powers masking her rishi and reaitsu instinctively. A small part of her mind argued that her Taiocho would understand but that part was overwhelmed by the need to survive.

She noticed the sky darkening and she made her way guided by instinct alone to the small cave she and Ami had found during their academy days. It had been a hideout a place to study and for her a place she could relax her control once in a while when the stress of classes had been too much.

She entered the cave thru the screening bushes and pushing aside the camouflage netting and collapsed on one of the ragged futons they had left there pulling the threadbare ragged blanket over herself she curled up into a ball against the wall of the small cave trusting her instincts to warn her of any danger.

_**General point of view. **_

Komamura found the small cave and made his way thru the netting. He peered thru the darkness catching Nikki's scent. He heard a whimper coming from the corner of the cave and saw her in the dim light curl tighter into a ball, the threadbare blanket and her shredded uniform barely keeping out the cold. He pulled the blanket from the pack and quickly before she could move away swaddled her in its folds he settled down on the futon and pulled her into his lap. She whimpered and attempted to struggle away but he soothed her with low growls gently nuzzling her hair.

"Shhhhh little one it's alright I'm here. You're safe, I understand. You are not alone, and now neither am I." he said holding her close.

* * *

(1) This is a spoiler for my odd bird fic so I'm keeping it vague on purpose as this is a bit further on the timeline *smile* although I did put it in the first chapter she remembers her past and family. I might tie this into odd bird as well if I can.

(2) Yes I'm pulling a bit more from Inu Yasha which belongs to Rumiko and not me please don't sue.

I'm sorry it's so short and it's terribly late my two week visit to my mum's turned into a month long agonizing trip with helping her move AGAIN! Gawds I get down there for thanksgiving expecting to have to do the usual repairs and fixing her ancient computer fix a few meals and the like and get a "surprise you're helping me move kiddo". Well I wouldn't have minded usually but I had (and still have a little bit of ) a bronchial infection. So there I was in what I termed as Hueco Mundo when I got not one but two subs to this story.

Musical Inspiration for this chapter:

True Light (the original Japanese version I don't have the artist info)

Nothing I won't Give Vic Mignogna Metafiction

Pain Three doors down

Leave out all the rest Linkin' Park

Kagarou Buck Tick

Time Is Running Out Muse

With You Linkin' Park

(a few others I can't find the song info for *grin*)


End file.
